In a previous posting discussed the cycle of abuse, we how the offender the victim fall into an unhealthy cycle. Although the months or even years, may eventually lose their self-respect and the victim, the own identity. Usually by this time the victim is so socially isolated and pulling that can only rely on the offender. by that time the victim accepts the abuse as a "normal". He and they will remain in the relationship because they feel that they are not better than the perpetrator. This is what the offender. Complete control and domination.
Apart from maintaining the victim spinning aimlessly around in a circle of abuse, there are specific tactics that an abuser used to get and retain the control of the victim.
Dominance: the offender to exercise control over the victim, if possible. He or she will decide by the victim, when and where. For example, may be the culprit by the victim, what can I say wear these or these or where he or she can go. The offender will tell the person what to do and expect to live without question. The offender will fall victim as a slave, servant, a piece of property.
Humiliation: one of the most effective ways of breaking the spirit of man wants to denigrate them. The offender will use the name phone, put downs, public reprimand and shaming the victim to feel bad itself. He or she will tell you what you might think of chip away at the self esteem of the victim. If the offender the victim feel useless and faulty, you can easier. Also reduces the chance of a person leaving the relationship.
: Isolation of from the time that the offender, the victim is feeling useless, he or she will act to the victim that depend on them. The offender does this by isolating the victim from friends and family. many victims of abuse need to request permission to go places and see their loved ones. First some abusers can even prevent the victim from going to work or school.
Threats and intimidation: if it is resistant to the perpetrator tries to take control of the victim will often threaten or intimidate him. The two used to scare the victim into submission and to remain in the relationship. The offender can weapons Show or property damage. He or she can also threaten to harm or kill the victim, their family and friends or pets. Some drug users may even threaten to harm or kill themselves if the victim remains with him.
Excuses: maltreatment virtually never would take responsibility for their own deeds. He or she will often deny the abuse never took place or that the victim about exaggerating. When the perpetrator to admit error, the perpetrator is full of excuses. He or she had a bad day. He or she had a bad childhood. He or she was a bad relationship. He or she is simply afraid to lose from the victim. At the end of the day is never the culprit responsible for bad behavior. Instead, he or she shifts the blame to the victim. Somehow he always responsible for the abuser actions.
Contrary to popular perception, the offender full control. The perpetrator who chooses to abuse and when and where to exploit them. Everything he or she is not to dominate the victim. Being so closely that nobody but the offender and the victim actually know what happens.
If you or someone you know being abused, it is important to get help. Tell someone you trust about abuse. If you think they can't help you or you need help, call 1800 -799-ASFALeS.
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